I am not an idiot?

Last night, I had plans with Michele. (I'd link to her blog but she doesn't have one. You need to rectify that, Michele.) She lives a few hours away but was going to be in town on an errand. So we made dinner plans. I was excited, people. Michele is awesome and fun. And dinner out in the middle of the week? Pure hedonism! We were to meet at 6:15. 3:45 - Mapquest directions. Read them over, thinking "Uh huh uh huh uh huh .9 miles. Got it. I can do that because I am not an idiot." 3:50 - Receive call from Nick. He's running late, Jake's baseball practice has been canceled. We decide that I will pick up Jake go home where we will wait for Nick. 5:15 - Nick arrives home. We decide that Claire will stay home since she's on a nap strike. She's as cranky as a bear woken in January. Jake will come with me. 5:35 - Jake and I leave. 6:00 - I'm almost there (or so I think). I get gas since we've got time to kill. 6:08 - Hm. It's not here where I expect it to be. That's OK! I can find it! I'm not an idiot! 6:12 - Hm. It's not this way either. Oh, I know! It's actually on this other road. I must have been confused. 6:18 - Hm. It's not here either. Maybe the other way. 6:25 -&*$&%&* 6:30 - Uh-oh. How did I get on this highway? OK, no problem. We're only 15 minutes late. We can find it! I'm not an idiot! 6:35 - "Yes, Jake, that's the airport. Yes, it does appear that I'm driving in circles." 6:40 - We stop at a liquor store and look up the address. It was on the first road, but miles away from where we were. I am not an idiot - Mapquest was wrong. 6:45 - Back on track. 6:55 - $%&*^& We should have found it by now! 7:00 - We give up and hit the McDonald's drive through. I return home with my tail tucked firmly between my legs. 7:25 - Arrive home, look up Michele's number. Call and apologize. And SHE apologized to ME! She apologized to me because I am an idiot. Now that, my friends, is a nice person.

A First Easter

Last year, around this time, Nick and Jacob watched a National Geographic special about Good Friday in the Philippines. A Filipino man was willingly crucified in a re-enactment, although he did not die. The show left deep marks on Jacob. Nick, a non-Catholic and non-practicing Christian, was at a loss to explain. He managed a "that man believes that being crucified will bring him closer to God." He deeply regrets watching the show with Jake - Nick just did not realize how much Jacob would be affected. Jake had nightmares for a few weeks, and has talked about it on and off for the past year. I think Nick had nightmares too when he realized what had happened. But we talked about it and talked about it and talked about it, and I think that Jacob has as thorough an understanding as any five year old can. And this lent, Jacob has been making big strides in his faith. Yesterday was Palm Sunday. Jake was excited about the palms and the procession. He understood about Jesus riding into Jerusalem and relished the procession. I half-think he was expecting a donkey to ride by! Once we were settled inside, I sent Jake off to the Children's Liturgy and listened to the passion myself. A little while later, Jacob came back with a construction paper palm leaf. He had drawn on it. I bent over to look at it closely. "That's Jesus with the cross. And see? I drew this other path. He's going to go the wrong way and then he won't die on the cross." The kind lady behind us gasped a little bit. I might have as well. But then it was time for the Lord's Prayer and we moved on. So, in many ways, this is Jacob's first Easter. I'm trying very hard to explain the resurrection as thoroughly as the crucifixion. It is hard. The sad truth is that suffering is easier to understand than salvation But I will persevere. I will find a way. If my boy is going to understand sacrifice, he's going to understand love too.

How to make a boy happy

Step 1: Go to turtle park and climb on turtles. Suggest that he kick off his shoes and climb barefoot. Step 2: Surprise him with a trip to Pizza Hut, where he can redeem a gift certificate he earned by reading. Step 3: Get thoroughly soaked in a rainstorm on the way back to the car. Step 4: Reminisce about the time you got wet all the way down to your underwear (make sure to say "underwear" in a scandalous tone. Step 5: Enjoy the giggling.